NFL Divisional, '25
Twerker
Twerker
- NFL Divisional Round Preview
- YouTube Rabbithole
Alright @YouTheReader,
Today’s tune is LiAngelo Ball’s new hit record called Twerker.
LiAngelo Ball, aka Gelo, aka G3, or whatever we’re calling him, was the bright bulb Ball brother who started an international incident when he got caught shoplifting Louis Vuitton Sunglasses in China. He was there on UCLA’s summer basketball trip and was subsequently kicked off the team, ending his hoops dreams. This all happened pre-COVID, so it feels like 50 years ago, but anyway, now he’s newly signed to Def Jam Records because this TikTok tune is all the rave on the internet!
Emphasis on the WoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOah part…
On to the better ball…
NFL Divisional Round ‘25
Saturday
The Houston Texans upset the Chargers in the Wild Card Round as their biggest stars came to play. On offense, WR Nico Collins and RB Joe Mixon each went for over 100 yards with their own score. On defense, CB Derek Stingley came down with 2 interceptions, while DE Will Anderson Jr. came up with 2 sacks. Another element that Houston may have going for them is they just played the Chiefs in Kansas City less than a month ago in Week 16. Although the Chiefs pulled it out, the Texans put up a fight, losing 27-19.
Travis Kelce on The Pat McAfee Show let it slip this week, “There might be a few (new Taylor Swift songs)… I can’t say any of that —I’ll never chime in, but I’m here to support it. I’m here to see where it can go.” Holy shit!! New music is on the way; everybody, please remain calm and compose yourselves!! As for the Chiefs, Patrick Mahomes has led Kansas City to 6 straight AFC Championship games. It’s been every year since he took over the starting job in ‘18. Mahomes and the Chiefs only trail the New England Patriots’ record of 8 consecutive AFC Championship appearances from 2011-2018. As for the tattletale boyfriend, he’s closing in on Jerry Rice’s postseason record of receiving yards and touchdowns. Kelce needs 342 receiving yards and 3 TDs to match Rice’s all-time career records. It is certainly feasible if the Chiefs were to reach the Super Bowl.
Prediction: 24-16 KC (-7.5 KC & Under 41.5)
Washington and Detroit have faced each other 3 times in postseason play. The Redskins won all 3 contests in 1981, 1992, and 1999. Last Sunday was the first playoff win of the Commanders’ Era. As a franchise, Washington has not played in the NFC Divisional Round since 2005. Rookie QB Jayden Daniels has made all the difference in the world. In the 4th Quarter of the Wild Card Round, Daniels found Terry Scary McLaurin for a go-ahead TD and then Commanded the Commanders to their game-winning field goal as time expired. It should be no surprise that Daniels plays with poise in clutch situations; his 12 4th Quarter TD passes are the most ever by a rookie. On the defensive side of the football, Washington’s veteran linebacker Bobby Wagner will face an old NFC West foe in Jared Goff. The 11-time All-Pro LB played against Goff from ‘16 to ‘20 when they were on their Seahawks and Rams. While he may be dealing with an ankle injury, look for the brilliant defensive signal caller to pick up on some of Goff’s tendencies.
The Detroit Lions finished their 15-2 regular season with a +222 point differential. It’s the 25th-best margin of all-time and the best among an NFC team since the 2001 Greatest Show on Turf Rams. After their bye week in the Wild Card Round, the Lions will welcome back RB David Montgomery and CB Terrion Arnold. On their O-Line, rookie Christian Mahogany, a Paramus Catholic alum, will start over Kevin Zeitler at RG as the veteran lineman has been ruled out with a hamstring. Without Montgomery in the final 3 games of the season, Jahmyr Gibbs saw 64 carries for 365 rushing yards and 6 total TDs. Expect Gibbs to continue to handle RB1 duties as the Lions ease Montgomery back into action. The Lions have been the most impressive team in football this season. My one nitpick narrative entering their Saturday Night matchup is that both their coordinators, OC Ben Johnson and DC Aaron Glenn, are favorites to land head coaching gigs after interviewing with teams during their bye week. While I expect the Lions to advance, I think that an extra bit of distraction and Jayden Daniels can at least make things interesting.
Prediction: 31-23 DET (+8.5 WSH & Under 55.5)
Sunday
The Rams and Eagles last met in the playoffs during the 2001 NFC Conference Championship, with the Rams winning on home turf. LA absolutely throttled the Vikings on Monday Night, jumping out to a 24-3 lead by halftime, and never looked back. Defensively, the Rams sacked Sam Darnold 9 times and forced 2 turnovers. The young Los Angeles defense has been playing on another level lately, giving up just 9 or fewer points in 4 of their last 5 games. QB Matthew Stafford has also been a major difference-maker with the Rams this time of year. Since being traded to LA in ‘21, Stafford is 18-3 in the winter months of December, January, and February. The unfortunate part for Stafford is this game will be played in Philly with a forecast of snow. In 9 career outdoor games in the snow and rain, Matthew Stafford has gone 1-8 with a 54.6% completion percentage, 14 TDs, and 11 INTs.
To make matters worse for Stafford’s passing game, the Philadelphia Eagles allowed the fewest passing yards all season (174.2 passing yards per game). When the Eagles played the Rams in Week 12, Philadelphia sacked Stafford a season-high 5 times. The Eagles can generate a pass rush just by sending 4 guys, which goes against Stafford’s ability to beat the blitz. In their Week 12 win over LA, Eagles star RB Saquon Barkley rushed for a season-high 255 yards. Barkley’s big play ability on any given run and Jalen Hurts’ mobility should give Philly a huge advantage in this wintery mix.
Prediction: 21-14 PHI (-6 PHI & Under 43.5)
Speaking of snow storms, Buffalo has a 50% shot of precipitation this Sunday night with 10°F (-12°C). The game of the weekend and the final battle for the MVP race will be frigid. Ravens QB Lamar Jackson told reporters, “I’d rather not be cold, but defenders don’t want to tackle in freezing temperatures.” The star QB also told reporters he won’t be wearing gloves no matter how freezing the temperatures, “I tried it in practice. I was terrible.” If Jackson can’t grip the ball much, it may not be the worst thing; he’s the best running QB since Vick and Derrick Henry will be more than willing to carry the load. In 8 career playoff games, Henry has rushed for 150+ yards in 4 of them. Last weekend, Henry had 26 carries for 186 yards and 2 scores. The future Hall of Fame running back has a realistic shot of passing Marshawn Lynch (52 yards away) and John Riggins (78 yards away) for the 7th most rushing yards in playoff history. Defensively, it’s been well-documented that Baltimore turned their season around when they moved Safety Kyle Hamilton back to playing Centerfield. The Ravens’ defense was terrible in the 1st Half of the season when Hamilton was playing in the slot; however, they were excellent against the Bills in Week 4. In their 35-10 win, they held Josh Allen to just 180 passing yards and 21 rushing yards.
